This is the basic, so, let's try to make this simple.

In S&M scenes, it is normal that a player, with time, will do scenes that are more and more daring and dangerous. Let's face it, the S&M part in BDSM is one of the components of BDSM and the danger of hurting someone is real.

But don't go crazy when you read this, because there are other human activities that are as dangerous as S&M; sports for instance (football, hockey, soccer, boxing...In these sport, one of the reason that they can be done safely is because the players in these sports are usually trained to recognize dangerous conditions and to stay away from these situations.

In sports, there are organized groups and manuals to do help train the people.

In BDSM, there are none.

Like everything else in BDSM, the way people do there S&M scenes is personal and different. It is impossible to give general rules to avoid 100% of dangerous situations.

Instead, in this article, I will try to show you how to recognize these dangerous situations. I may, if possible, make suggestions to make your scenes safer, but, you are the only one who can make your scene to be relatively safe. And yes, both Dominant and submissive have their part in this. (or top and bottom)

 

No hit Zone:

The title says it all.

The human body is an amazing machine. I, for one, am amaze to see how much abuse a human body can take. But, like any machine, on (and in) the human body, there are some weak spots where the body can be seriously damage (read being hurt) if one is not aware.

When a new BDSM adept start in his or her journey in S&M and get involved in his first S&M scene, usually, the plays are soft but, after a while, this new adept get more sure of himself and the scenes become harder.

This is when things are at it most dangerous. The adepts, more confident about his "craft", starts to take more chance in the scenes. Yet, not having the experience about the dangers and not having the experience needed to "better read" the submissive, this is often where that adept build his or her experience by making mistakes. If the adept in question is lucky, nothing serious will result from the mistakes. But just counting on luck is not enough.....

Just knowing that there are such things like parts of the body that are more fragile than others is already a good thing. But knowing which part of the body are the most at risk is the key to be able to play harder and not to take too many risks.

Every bodies are different. Size, height, weight, having or not fat, past medical operation, current medical conditions, all affect the way to be play in S&M.

The first step to be safe starts with the negotiation. This is when the Dominant person needs to learn about the medical past of the submissive person.

The next step is to do research and learn about the human body. Where are the important part of the body; kidney, heart, bladder, liver .... Believe it or not, but these part can be damage from a bad S&M scene and if a scene is hard enough, it can seriously create medical condition from such a play.

Finally, the last step is the communication between the players DURING a scene. If the submissive or bottom, feel that something is wrong during the play; the Dominant or top MUST BE informed right away. Usage of the safe word here is the key.

Pressure points:

Pressure points are in bondage what "no hit zones" are in S&M.

Bondage is very erotic. If done lightly (no serious bondage), it is just a kinky sex game, but, when people starts to get in serious bondage, this is an issue.

"Pressure points" is not the right expression to describe the following, but, no other words exists to describe this. So, in the context of a bondag BDSM adepts use this terminology.

Officially, a "pressure point" is a spot on the body where there is an amount of nerves close to the surface of the body. People in martial arts learn where these points are, so they can use them in their fight. If someone hit the right spot (the pressure point) the "victim" get to be disable either from the pain or by the simple fact that the message from the brain cannot reach the muscles that are connected by the nerves.

In a bondage situation; the term "pressure points "is use to describe part of the body where it is dangerous to do bondage. Nerves can be permanently damage by a bad bondage, yes, but blood circulation is the real problem!

Like in S&M, where there are "no hit zones" in bondage, there are "pressure points "that must be respected.

To learn about the pressure points of your partner, it starts in the negotiation; Medical history, back problems, poor blood circulation are information that must be disclosed ...

A trick; any of the joints on your limbs there are a spot where it is soft (the inside of the elbows, the wrist if you look at the inside of your hand, shoulders, knees, ankles ...), these are "pressures points"

There are ways to make a very efficient bondage WITHOUT crushing any of the artery or pressure points. Learn the technics.

The submissive or bottom must be aware of what is happening with their own body. They are the one that can say to their Dominant partner if there are problems with the scene. This is why we use safeword!

During your scene with bondage, The Dominant MUST ALWAYS check the circulation; if the hands of the submissive is tied together, are the hands becoming cold our black (that indicate no blood circulation). For any limbs, this technic is valid; just check for signs of poor blood circulation. If it happens, stop the scene, call the safeword (yes, even if you are the Dominant!).

Being aware that there are parts of the body that can be damage during a BDSM scene, is already a good start. When you play, keep this in mind.

 

Maître Pierre

© THE BDSM CIRCLE - LE CERCLE BDSM 2001 - 2026